Okay y'all I'll be real with you there's very little editing on this one. I wanted to get something out the door, I wasn't able to get Ashley and Luke's original recordings, so you're getting the raw backup with only the beginning and end themes added. That said, I hope you all enjoy it! I think it was still a lot of fun.

...fuck me this was recorded in october 2017 I'M SO SORRY

I’ma be real with y’all. I don’t really have it in me to write up a summary. You know what this episode is about.

This episode is like, 98% Dave and Terezi. Enjoy, shippers.

Vriska helps John get into some new gear. John catches up with his best friend. Kanaya is worried that Rose is dangerous, but she's not quite sure who she's a danger to.

John get re-acquainted with his now destroyed room as Vriska is a little worried about cleaning supplies. Rose shows off some new skills, and Kanaya does her best to outsmart and outwit the LaLonde Human.

Karkat gets a bit ahead of himself talking to John. Terezi addresses the rest of the crew and asks if they should really spend all of their time trolling these dumb humans. Vriska puts her own plans into motion.

Sollux encounters a problem entering the game that Feferi seems to know how to fix, and we take a brief time out to talk to our good friend Andrew Hussie. Derse is explored, more Classpects revealed, we meet a few exiles, and perhaps even begin to understand just how all of them came to be that way.

We take a brief interlude to learn how trolls love, and, well, make love? I guess? Eridan kills a whale. Feferi moves on.

It's hard, Kanaya.

Being a kid, and growing up.

It's hard, and nobody understands.

Aradia and Equius do a little RP and get a bit too close. Vriska is recruited by Karkat. Operation REGISURP is put into motion, and we learn about the true state of Sgrub.

We take a look back. Vriska loses an eye. Aradia loses her life. Mr. Vanilla Milkshake is revealed to be one Doc Scratch, and he's not very happy with the situation on Alternia.

We meet Vriska and answer some messages while Equius is...well, Equius.

Sollux changes his mind about playing Sgrub and has an unfortunate mind honey-fueled incident. Kanaya confronts Aradia. Nepeta gives Tavros some bad news, and we learn about the Team Charge Incident. Also, Aradia prototypes herself?!?

Tavros plays some card games with Tinkerbull. Terezi meets her lusus for just a moment. Kanaya is living in a familiar land. Vriska trolls Tavros, Karkat continues showing off his leadership skills, and we learn of a Demon who is Already Here.

Karkat usurps leadership from Terezi who...doesn't really care. Sollux creates a game. Aradia causes some destruction for...some reason.

Alternia is a planet far away from our own, and actually, Earth doesn't exist yet. Let's get introduced to Karkat, Gamzee, and Terezi! We didn't want to read anything about the Kids for a while, right?

John gets more information.. Dave confronts his own mortality and makes a new friend. Jade saves a brother. Rose is busy.

The Reckoning begins.

A Villein becomes a Vagabond.

A Mistress becomes a Medicant.

A Regulator becomes a Renegade.

A Queen becomes a Questant.

Dave chills with Davesprite. Jules loses it. John gets some answers in the Veil. Jules Loses It. AR discovers some of John's Family History. JULES LOSES IT.

Listen. I won't lie to you. This episode is MOSTLY about Rose and Dave doing their Gristmas stuff, so like... I hope you enjoy that.

John enters Rose's home and breaks her stuff. Rose has an eventful nap. Dave obtains a pair of personal journals. AR? fuckin' shreds.

John gets in trouble with Terezi. Dave has to go back. A Rose fades into the void. Jack Noir Ascends.

Tavros and Kanaya get some advice from Rose and Dave. John's Present has gone missing. PM? and AR? get into some trouble. A deal is struck.

John gets himself into some very hot water. The recent past is recalled. Jade is very abruptly awoken. Dave's plumbing gets rearranged. Rose hears from a Questant.

John enters the Land of Wind and Shade. Dave gets set up with his server player. Jade explains that she has only just as much information about the world as John. Rose enters the Land of Light and Rain.

Spades Slick built this town. Now he's going to destroy it.

Jules and Molly get acquainted with the Midnight Crew and join them on their quest for revenge against the Felt. Diamonds Droog gets busy with Fin, Clubs Deuce interrogates Doze, Hearts Boxcars is assaulted by a full bakery of goons, and Spades Slick built this town. 

Rose and Dave have a merry Gristmas and get some stylish new looks. Dave makes a bunch of useless shit. AR, PM, and WV Get...acquainted? Jade delivers some important packages. Rose enters.

Jade shows us Prospit and gives us quite a few revelations. John has a little Gristmas! WV & PM Defend themselves from the onslaught of AR's weaponry. Jules is a gun nerd.

John discovers a horrifying secret about his father. Rose escapes the lab. Jade goes to sleep.

John wins a fight. Rose finds a cat. Dave gets his ass kicked. Jade finds her grandpa. Jules loses her goddamn mind.

We finally meet Jade as we enter Act 3! She has a conversation with Rose. John gets beat up by a pair of rather large ogres. PM has a fuckin' DOPE sword.

Dave climbs. Rose disconnects. Jade wishes she could tell us more. John prepares for a boss fight. WV ascends.

We keep chugging along through the second act! John forgets about stairs. Rose throws a bathtub. Dave has a....concerning apartment. 

John is in the Medium and needs to build up! Rose helps him do so and has a....weird discussion with Jade. Dave introduces us to Lil Cal. Jules is worried.

Jules and Molly continue to make their way through Act 2. Dave kills a bird. Rose retreats mausoleum-ward. Jade knows more than she really should. John gets into a fight. Nannasprite appears and tells John about the Ultimate Riddle.

Jules heads home to Australia but that can't stop the Homestuck train!

Rose's computer loses power and she resorts to escaping to the mausoleum. John loses his father's car and meets a long lost relative. Dave starts to show us a bit more about who he is. Jade investigates a meteor.

We rejoin young John Egbert as he prototypes his kernel and finds out there's a meteor about to crash into his house. Uh oh! We also meet young Rose LaLonde, who is trying to help John while dealing with a power outage and a raging storm. Can Rose help John escape from the meteor bearing down on him!?